world, you got me questioning

a good evening today.

it's June! the month when finally, the long-awaited three-months holiday starts. happy holiday everyone!

anyway i still worry about what might fill my time in these frustrating three months and what i can do to pay for my holiday hedonism cost, haha. i've been asking if there's any of my family or their friends who wants a part-timer, but the answers are all NO... aww.

and i accept orders of graphic design jobs... so call me if you have one! you know, i ever thought of taking this graphic-design business to the next level, but i think i am not ready to maintain it. besides i still lack of experience (and even the skill, i can use only Photoshop. not even Illustrator or Corel Draw) :( but for simple event posters, ballyhoos, greeting/birthday invitation cards, and so on, believe me i can do that... just ask me for my portfolio! :) just contact me via email, twitter, or facebook! ;)

well, talk about that later.
i have particular things to write today.

i just finished reading this book, Supernova by Dee.
nah, i am not that genius, not even that smart to fully understand what this book is about. it talks about some physics-combined-with-philosophy stuffs to begin with. but it is also about romance, a beautiful and sad one...


and it got me thinking about something.

it's about why people do things. believe things. and what, after (and if) those things are not going as planned? if those break your heart? and worse... if your whole world ruin apart as those things don't satisfy your needs and wants? or even, if you realize that those things are just your unreachable fantasy?

why do people do things? is it because they love it? because they are simply told by someone to do it? or because they earn money for it?
if they don't love it, how can they bear the boredom of doing it? or even the hatred?

why do people believe particular things? for example, their God? or how they believe that their girl/boyfriend is their lifetime soulmate?

and yes. what if your heart breaks because of those things you do, you believe, you love, or even you give your life into? can you bear the pain? can you bear the satisfaction of people who say 'i told you', 'see', 'i warned you before', 'this is because you didn't listen to me', or even 'yes, feel that!' ?

just saying. no - just wandering.